Is it abuse if I enjoyed it

I watching The Game  ( I don’t remember which episode) where the character Malik was talking about how he lost his virginity to an older girl and then jokingly asks “Was I abused?” This episode reminded me of some guy back in college who did it with their mboch several times and was telling us that it’s not abuse because he actually enjoyed himself!

A couple of months back there was a clip on one of our local stations about Samburu girls being given necklaces with some Morans to show that they are an item. The girls are usually aged between 9 – 15 and the Moran is allowed to come to a special Manyatta (which they call Singira) constructed for them and have their way with the lovely young lasses. I was about to have a hernia when one of the girls was interviewed and said something very unusual. Now according to her she feels special to have gotten the necklace. Not only does this make her beautiful but she feels safe as the Moran protects her. Now yours truly was as confused as you are now. While the rest of Kenya is appalled at this practice the lass is over the moon!

I also used to think that those religions and cultural practices where women are supposed to wear amboka and cover themselves completely was oppressive. That was until I met this lady the other day who was telling me how she likes to cover herself up and wishes the rest of the women would do the same. She also expresses her disgust at the women in the music video who dress semi naked gyrating their booty for the entire world to see. She blamed the music producers and musicians for abusing this women and making them dance like that. Eeer… when I look at them video vixens they don’t look oppressed to me. They actually seem to enjoy what they do. Infact some of them go one to make shitloads of money with some even writing memoirs detailing the juicy stories of the video making industries. And here I am this poor old manqué writer who can’t get a book deal to save her life. Lawd! Life is so unfair!!

What about those street kids who refuse to be rehabilitated. They keep on running away from the safe homes where they have been adopted. Or this lady who told me she likes when her man beats her up because it shows that he cares? O.O It is even sad because she provokes her man every once in a while so that he can slap her around to remind her that there is still passion in their relationship. 

photo from Rihannas S&M video

Just when I think I’ve seen the last of crazy people someone just comes and takes it to a new level. How in the-name-of-anything-sacred is FIDA and all the other organization help these kinds of people who enjoy abuse???Now people is it abuse if the victim enjoys it? Should we step it or just let them come back to their senses (if they ever do at all)?