me and my big mouth

Relax people its not what you think

It all started a few days ago when I made fun of my male friend who always puts photos of cars as his profile picture on facebook. I may have asked him (or rather told him)the reason why he did so is because he thought he was ugly. I didn’t stop there, I went on to nudge him as I laughed at my own joke, which I thought was brilliant lame Unfortunately my male pal did not share the humour in my observation. what was up his up his arse? If anything he was pretty pissed and he didn’t say anything.

After a few weeks , he swung by and calmly told me how my joke was in bad taste...blah blah blah. I cant remember the rest of his speech because I felt so horrible for hurting his feelings.

I always thought men are strong emotionally and are immune to bad jokes told at their expense.Men call each other bad nick names all the time. The men in my family let me get away with stuff so I have never really know just what a potty mouth I have until this dude brought it to my attention. Which brings me to my other point, apparently men hate it when women call them “dude” but its okay to call other that.what! This was brought to my attention by @antwarogue in her blog which was not titled as she went cold turkey on men.

She claims she hates men but we know better.lol

The more we talked the more he reminded me of other incidences where I suffered a severe bout of verbal diarrhea. Here I am going through life thinking am all that and a bag of chips and then some while busy robbing some men off their self esteem. He claimed that in college I asked some guy if he was gay .You see he had shit loads of teddy bears on his bed.

Who does that?

Which confused me further. Men ask each other all the time jokingly if someone is gay if they do something feminine: and the “no homo” disclaimer(whats up with that?) but if I say it they want to rip out my uterus and hit me with it. Just when I think I have understood men they switch it on me [just confuse the enemy(read me)].

This is like the word “nigger” its okay if a person of the black persuasion says it.If other people say it, its racist..come on people you are killing me here.

Any who in the mean time I have decided to put my lips to better use:build up people,blow..blow kisses..yes blow kisses etc and stay away from those words that make my male friends want to chase me down the village with torches and pitchforks like Frankenstein.By the way do they have “loud mouths anonymous?" and if yes who is going to sponsor me? I cannot do it alone.