The superman syndrome
This especially gets my goats and makes me wanna go settle at the bottom of the ocean...for real though. Had this great male pal who was always buying me uplifting music, getting me encouraging books...which at first i thought was cute until i discovered he was tryna fix me. Like i wasn't good enough to date so he had to fix me first. (O.k. i have come undone but that's beside the point)We want a boy friend..not a therapist. We have girlfriends for that. This especially a common trait in Christian over-saved boys(if you have never seen an over saved person, then you are the over saved person). You can't save all of us good boys, you can't undo the wrong your fathers and brothers have done to the girls. Just take us as we are and live one day at a time and ignore the chip on our shoulders, with time it will begin to disappear. Try not to step on the emotional land mines and make as explode into big smoke of emotions(gawd! with phrases like this i should have finished my novel already)You can't fix someone, that's for them to do it. You can pour the wine into the jars brethren but only our dear Lord can turn it into wine.
You are nice to everyone
Most nice guys are good to everyone. They are surrounded by lots of friends which include beautiful women with whom you will have to compete for attention. What they do for you they do to everyone so it really hard to know if they like you. Some guy in college used to hang out with me and my girls all the time.He later started acting weird and one of his boys accused me of breaking his heart and honest to God i had no idea. We had never hang out just the two of us and he never ever said anything. So how was i supposed to know? If you like a girl you have to do for her something that you don't usually do to other people...no not that dufus...get the gutter off your mind.
You are not really a good guy, you are just acting
There are good guys and GOOD GUYS! I have read a lot of blogs by dudes whining about how they are nice guys but don't seem to be able to wife a chic.Personally i know nice guys who are not even aware they are nice guys. Good is not what you do, is who you are. Some guys just act nice hoping they will get rewarded for their niceness. Like all good actors sometimes they forget their lines and their true nasty selves come out. Women can get that nasty vibe from you and will stick around for the favours but never give you their hearts. Be nice for niceness sake not because you expect chics to trip over themselves falling for you. Real nice guys don't even know they are good. If you refuse a guys advances and he starts acting like an ass, he was never a nice guy to begin with.
You don't say what you want
Some guy friend of mine was being nice to this chic hoping she will notice that he loves her. When i asked him if he told her how he felt but he said no as he expected the chic to see for herself. I know we women have great instincts but we are no psychics, we can't read your mind. Say what you want clearly and articulately so that we don't get it twisted.Put it all out there...
Too good to be true
I have a friend who is annoyingly nice. He lets me get away with everything, i can call him at anytime of the day and he is always spiffy. I can't point any weakness in him and i have never seen him angry and that to me is abnormal. How can someone be so perfect? Compared to me he's an angel. If he ever asks me i will definitely say no, maybe because i feel i don't deserve him or maybe i think he is pretending to be nice to win me over in which case i will be really pissed when we get together and i discover he a monster,so why even go there? Chelewa for some dates, say no to a woman sometimes, speak your mind, have an opinion. For crying out loud when we do something wrong be mad and express it in words!
If i date you things will change
When a guy is wooing you he is always nice and agreeable and everything is perfect. That is the reason why women play hard to get for long, don't let them tell you different. As soon as you fall for him and get into the relationship routine the nice stuff stop coming. You become part of the furniture in his house. We are always afraid that if we say yes all the privileges will be withdrawn because now you have us where you want. Most of my friends who are married tell me how the mzee stops trying to do the nice little things he used to do. If we hold out for long, we will get to enjoy the pampering for a little longer.
He is a welcome home door mat
Most good guys don't have cohones.They let everybody walk over them from family, friends, boss etc. this is the kind of guy who won't protect you when his family or friends start meddling in your personal affairs. When you get together with him people will assume you are alike and will start walking all over you too. He will skip dates to hang out with the boys, he will use the family emergency fund to bail out a friend, your children will be indisciplined as he won't back you up, your house will become a casino where you will be entertaining guests from Monday to Sunday all because your our Mr.right doesn't know how to say no.
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